Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day.  A day we take for granted until the one day that we no longer have a Mother to celebrate.  I have been without my mother for about 21 Mother's Days now and it really doesn't get easier, I've just learned to adjust things to make it less painful.  I think of my Mother almost daily and the thought of her brings me comfort; except today.  Today is the day when the impact of not having a mother hits me the hardest; so I try to remember the things about her that brought her joy and in doing so, it brings me that much closer to my own children.

My mother enjoyed family most of all.  If you asked her what she wanted for Mother's Day she would always say, "I want all of my kids around me."  Now, after having 2 adult children of my own, I know what she meant by that.  The hustle and bustle of life gets in the way and before you know it you haven't visited your mother in a week.  That is a week you will never get back.  It really doesn't take much time to touch bases with your mother and tell her how your life is going and finding out how her life is going.

Mom always had Sunday dinner at her home complete with spaghetti, sauce, meatballs and salad.  Sometimes, not always, we'd have dessert.  We all ate, hung out at mom's house for a while and then went home, leaving her and my father alone.  I didn't realize how much that "aloneness" can infiltrate the house.

What I'm learning now is that is isn't always about who is around, it's about who doesn't come around.  Each child is missed.  Each child brings to the table his/her uniqueness that makes a family a family.  It's not in the food, or the gifts, it's about your presence at an event designed to honor our mothers.

I'm lucky.  I talk to my children everyday on the phone, I see them at least one to two times per week.  They are always present on holidays (like Mother's Day).  They each bring a special uniqueness to my day.  They always bring me a smile inside that travels from my heart to my lips, to my eyes.  They are my gift on Mother's Day

Now I know that I was my mother's gift on Mother's Day.  It wasn't what I bought her, it was me all along.